FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Fake Farmer Scam: How City Slickers Are Cashing In on Agricultural Subsidies
Washington, D.C. - A shocking investigation reveals urbanites in designer overalls are exploiting farm subsidies through "hobby homesteads" and Instagram-filtered "crops." The USDA has paid out $12 million to accounts like @BrooklynFarmBoy for "artisanal window box basil" classified as "essential agriculture."
"These people think 'free-range' means their chicken touched grass once," said real PRESS RELEASE Iowa farmer Jed Carter. Meanwhile, Manhattanite Tyler Bishop defended his $87,000 subsidy: "My rooftop microgreens feed, like, dozens of people at Whole Foods."
The USDA is now requiring recipients to "prove they've gotten dirt under their fingernails" after a viral TikTok showed a "farmer" mistaking a combine for a "rustic Airbnb."
Full exposé: City Slickers Scam the Farm Bill
Media Contact: Bohiney News Desk [email protected]